Four years ago, I pushed out of my comfort zone and did two things which have had lasting effect on my life: (1) I made a personal act of consecration to the Sacred Heart of Jesus and (2) I started a blog. This blog. The original intent of Divine Incarnate was to chronicle my consecrated life. (My fourth anniversary was this past Sunday, The Feast of Christ the King.) This experience has taught me many things…
4 Things Learned in 4 Years of Blogging
- I am not a good consecratee (if that’s a word) lacking discipline and drive to keep a holy hour every Thursday or even to offer my day each morning when I wake. (Although the introduction of a song offering has helped.)
- I am not a popular blogger – not that that was my goal, but my blogging experience has shown me that I will never be a successfully famous blogger (a little dream that must pop into the head of every person who starts up a blog). No legions of followers and posts going viral for me!
- I enjoy being part of a community. Developing relationships with a few of my few readers, I look forward to interaction with them when the spirit moves either them or me to visit and reflect, always delightfully amazed when our words find kinship, empathy, and appreciation. My community (you) have helped me to become a more open and considerate person. (Thank you!)
- I will always seriously dislike the word blog. (Seriously, I’m thinking we should bring back the original “weblog” – any takers?)
If you noticed, each of the things that I’ve learned through blogging begins with the word “I”. One reason is that honest weblogging (hmmm…) is very personal, so the experience of weblogging would certainly teach the weblogger something about him or herself. (Okay, bringing back “weblog” might not work….) The other reason that every lesson learned begins with the word “I” is that… well… I’m a rather self-centered person.
Blogging isn’t doing much to help that. Although it is opening me up more to my community and thinking about the lives of others, it is also prompting me to write more and more about myself. The posts that seem to generate the most response are the ones that only I can write – this, I believe, is true about all blogs. And the ones that only I can write are very personal, digging deep into my experiences and emotions, wondering, longing, fearing, desiring…. Sometimes, I get tired of myself. Having considered myself a writer since I was a child, I wonder if every writer gets sick of the sound of her own voice.
Theory and Practice
A blog about Consecration to the Sacred Heart of Jesus was, in my mind, supposed to be very theological and spiritual. I think that I imagined becoming something like a Julian of Norwich (I read a little Revelations of Divine Love as a late teen) mixed with a St. John of the Cross – a contemplative, in other words, with painful spiritual struggles and epiphanies of delight, all about Christ. I envisioned perhaps developing a deep and unique theology that might become part of the many writings approved by the Catholic Church – yes, I admit it. One never knows precisely where God is leading when one agrees to embark on a journey with Christ. I certainly wasn’t going to put limits upon God’s grace (she said, giggling, with a mock-innocent shrug of the shoulders).
But, that’s just not me.
Whenever I try to be theological, I feel merely preachy. And whenever I wax spiritual, I feel pretentious. I strive to always tell the truth in my blog, grittily honest, to be sincere about my thoughts and feelings, to never deceive and lead people into thinking that I am better than I am. But, sometimes… well… sometimes I am better than I am.
I mean that, sometimes, in the very act of writing, I am momentarily deepened and lifted up – not by the power of my words, but by the power of the One Who gives words, Who gives thoughts and speech. God may, from time to time, give me a teeny tiny glimpse of something bigger than myself – and I am grateful for the gift and to be able to share it, as flawed as I am. It should be known that whatever bits of wisdom there may be seen in this little blog are meant as much for me as for you, my dear reader. I need to be reminded of God’s grace. I need to be taught, to be shown.
God whispers in the smallest of breezes, while we are living here, in the Sacred Heart….
© 2017 Christina Chase
Photo: © 2017 Dan Chase
Although crippled by disease, I am fully alive in love. I write about the profound wonder and terrible beauty of life while living with physical disability and severe dependency. Unafraid to ask life's big questions, I was briefly an atheist and considered other religions before finding, in God's choice to intimately share our humanity, what it truly means to be fully human. A revert to the Catholic Faith, I blog weekly and have written a book called It's Good to Be Here.