My Journey
I have always wanted the truth.
Being raised Catholic, I was poorly educated in the Faith, probably because, being in a wheelchair, people assumed that I was “closer to God” and, therefore, going straight to Heaven after death. Sadly, that bias is ignorant of the fullness of reality: not only sin and every human’s ability to fail (I am fully human), but also the sublime beauty of knowing God on earth, here and now. Loving life, I want the fullness of reality. Ever-curious and wanting what is true, even when it hurts, I was particularly created to seek the fullness of truth, body and soul.
Not long after receiving the Sacrament of Confirmation, I turned to comparative mythology and then away from Christianity as a dead question, like many of my generation. Not wanting to believe in the soul and a higher power out of fear and desire for comfort, I chose to become an atheist. I liked being an atheist, but it was short-lived. Because one day…
Silent and still beneath a grape arbor, I was enjoying the beauty of the day and of nothing beyond everything. Or what I thought was nothing, a void. Then…beneath the layers of sound, I became aware of Silence beyond the silence…Present Presence that is infinity, eternity, and I knew that this was the ultimate reality that everyone calls God. Not wanting to clutter my mind with concepts, words, or images for anything beyond my physical senses, I was tempted to disregard this new knowledge. To ignore infinite and eternal reality, however, would mean that I could no longer call myself a lover of truth.
After years of searching for connection to the Infinite/Eternal One, the Uncreated Creator, the Source of Being, the Author of Life, and after many explorations into new and ancient religions, I was much surprised to find so much truth in the teachings of Christianity. Reading the very first part of the Catechism of the Catholic Church floored me. Could this man, Jesus, the Christ, actually be God Incarnate? Nothing else on earth spoke to me more loudly about the Silence beyond the silence, more intimately about Infinity, more grittily about Love, than the Mystery of the Incarnation. In tremulous awe of the humility of God, I took the leap of faith.
And now, after continuous and ongoing exploration, I have consecrated myself to the Sacred Heart of Jesus — the Heart of truth, the Heart of love, the Heart of God — Divine Incarnate for me. This blog holds my reflections, thus consecrated. I invite you to reflect with me for the love of truth, for the love of God. Please subscribe to this blog and consider reading my book about God in the flesh and the sacred wonder of being human.
Christina Chase 
Hi
I have a nominated you for a few awards please free to pick and choose which ones you want.
I think you deserve them all should you choose to accept them.
Check out my page in “awards”
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Wow, I have a lot to learn about the blogosphere in general and about wordpress in particular – awards? Thank you for teaching me! And thank you very, very much for nominating me for one. I deeply appreciate the time and effort that you are taking to read what I’m sharing, for giving me a little part of yourself. I don’t take it lightly. I will, with humbled thanks, gladly accept the award (ray of sunshine, right?) …… just as soon as I figure out how all of this works! (Hee hee). I’m sure rereading your instructions will be very helpful. Keep up your insightful and humorous blogging – and thank you, again!
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Its my pleasure, you inspire me with your strength,courage,determination and drive.
A ray of sunshine indeed. 🙂
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Hi Christina modesty and humility both these words come to mind when i read this and your blog posts. I feel u r truely do your call here or at least one of them… i want to read more and i agree wiht limbiley 🙂
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There is a way to know God’s Truth and not doubt it Christina but we cannot reject Scripture for our own understanding or because of what we have been taught by others, regardless of who they are and how long it has been wrongly believed, we must seek God’s understanding not mans and there is a way to do this that gives us full assurance that it is God’s Truth we share.
Christian Love in Christ Jesus – Anne.
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Thank you for reflecting with me, Anne. I have visited your blog from time to time, but will try to do so more often. Although there was a time that I rejected Scripture, and certainly didn’t consider it Sacred, my journey with Christ has, of course, been a journey with the Bible. Truly, “Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ.” (St. Jerome.)
I am drawn to these words of yours: “we must seek God’s understanding not mans and there is way to do this that gives us full assurance that it is God’s Truth we share.” Would you mind sharing with me the “way to do this” as you understand it? Your witness is appreciated!
Pax Christi
Christina
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As you confirmed Christina “Truly, “Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ.” and this was me years ago , I found I was very confused with all the different teachings in Denominations, I knew The Holy Spirit did not say one thing to one person and something different to someone else if they contradicted although He may share something with you that you can share with me or I with you but it will always be confirmed in Scripture, if it’s not we reject it.
So being confused I went to God, He showed me the way to know who was sharing His Truth and who was in error, either because they are deceived or they are Cults and false teachers or because they do not understand the Scriptures fully only what they have been taught.
I will leave a link for you below Christina to save detail here but let me assure you, God knows those who are His and not one of us will be lost Eternally.
Confusion – https://freedomborn.wordpress.com/2014/06/16/my-battle-with-confusion/
God’s Abundant Blessings – Anne.
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Hi Christina. Peace and all good be with you. That is the greeting of St. Francis of Assisi, that small, inconspicuous man who kept a room always open for Jesus in his heart, and in that way was able to experience liberation in this buried mystery of love. I hope you have friends or family nearby who do bring you love and share it sincerely with you. Take care.
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Thank you for your visit and your greeting! Peace and all good be also with you.
To answer your question, of the many blessings in my life, I am most grateful for my family. My parents love me with a self-sacrificing love that has always been an example of Christ’s love – although I didn’t recognize it as such for years. As I am completely physically dependent, they take care of me every day. I don’t blame them for treating me like I didn’t need religion, for, to them, I was an innocent, suffering child who could do no serious wrong. It was a little too late, when I was a teenager, that they found out otherwise. 🙂 I have an older sister who lives nearby with her husband and two sons. Those boys are a great joy to me! So, yes, there are many people in my life whom I love dearly and with whom I share the love of God. Thank you for asking!
I read your brief bio on Gravatar and was struck by two things: soteriology and Handel – a subject of great interest to me (planning to write a thesis on a specific part) and my favorite composer. Do you have a blog or website? God bless you in all of your journeys.
Pax Christi
Christina
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Dear Christina,
Thank you for this reflection.
On 12 September I am writing about St Eanswythe, a local girl who founded England’s first monastery for women as a teenager in the early 7th Century. (Being the king’s daughter probably helped.) I wanted to link it to today’s young Christians, and would like, if I may, to include this paragraph of yours.
I have always wanted the truth.
Being raised Catholic, I was poorly educated in the Faith. Probably because, being in a wheelchair, people assumed that I was “closer to God” and, therefore, going straight to Heaven after death. But, that bias is ignorant of the fullness of reality – and I want the fullness of reality. I want the fullness of truth.
I hope that’s OK with you?
God Bless,
Maurice
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Sounds fascinating, looking forward to reading what you write! And I am honored that you want to include some of my words. It is more than okay with me! I assume there will be the usual credit with link. Thank you so much! May God bless you in all that you do,
Pax Christi
Christina
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Good Morning Christina,
A good morning it is, too. A walk with TJH’s two dogs – you may have read about them in the blog – and then back to your email. Good to see you’ve made contact with our Chris as well.
Thank you for your gracious permission to use your words; credit and link will be there.
Sister Johanna (SJC) will be following up soon with a week’s reflections on conscience. I’m looking forward to what she has to say.
God Bless,
Maurice.
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And good morning to you! (Still morning here.) I just figured out that I haven’t been following Agnellus’ Mirror by email, and have corrected the mistake. Enjoying your reflections as you travel, especially on interreligious dialogue.
Pax Christi
Christina
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Hi Christina, I think God just introduced me to you (and I believe I know why). I am an old guy who took too many years to get here–“here” being where you are. I too was raised Roman Catholic, but never fully learned about the real church, so I left what seemed to be its human expression. I turned to art instead, and to the mysteries and beauties of the natural world, since, in expecting religious leaders to be more-than-human, I wrongly judged that “organized religion” had made a mess of things. Why did I not understand that that we always make a mess of things? Because I couldn’t see that I myself usually did that; I suppose that was pride on my part–a kind of blindness that tricked me into thinking that the way I saw the world was the way the world really was. Fortunately, I was jarred awake, although rather late in the day. Through a series of “coincidences” I discovered an expression of Christian belief and practice that goes back even farther than the Roman church, all the way back to the writings of Luke (In “The Acts …”) and Paul and then the “early fathers” and the “desert fathers.” I am tempted to say that the nuns and priests never taught me about that version of faith, but it’s more honest to admit that I didn’t listen, and didn’t take the opportunity to investigate for myself. Or maybe I wasn’t ready. Whatever, as the kids say. But now the internet provides so many opportunities to learn and be inspired so, although its pretty lonely where I live (the liberal progressive secular world), I look forward to occasional meetings of spirit during the hours when I am not in church with “the communion if saints,” to use a phrase that used to sound (to me) artificial and theoretical… Used to.
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So glad to meet you here, Albert! I like that thought of “occasional meetings of spirit” as we converse share with others and each other here in the blogosphere.
Yes, sadly, many of us either did not receive a good education in the Catholic Faith or, as you said, perhaps simply didn’t listen. I have also used the internet to become better educated (and still do) especially by taking online classes, specifically through STEP @ The University of Notre Dame. One of the tidbits that I did learn was that there were Christians in Rome before either St. Peter or St. Paul got there… (as Scripture shows) – just FYI to maybe help you better date the Church in Rome. But, I do think I understand why you wrote that. For some reason, there were many Catholics who thought that there is no reason to read the Bible, and perhaps that was how you were raised and formed. (I was.) But, of course, as Saint Jerome tells us “Ignorance of Scripture is ignorance of Christ.”
I appreciate how you put “coincidences” in quotation marks when you described your coming back to the Christian faith. 🙂 Isn’t Albert Einstein credited with saying, “Coincidence is God’s way of remaining anonymous”? Would love to read more about your journey – could you link me to some place where you have written about it?
Looking forward to communing with you, my fellow saint-in-progress.
Pax Christi
Christina
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I haven’t written about it, but now I think I might try. I’ll let you know if…
Peace,
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How wonderful-that you have found the faith, and how lucky we are to have it! I am so grateful! And I’m amazed by the love and mercy of God who shares himself so fully with us!
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God is indeed generous – and works in mysterious ways!
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