Heartache
“Son, why have you done this to us?”[i] Okay. I’m just going to say it. I don’t want to contract covid–19 and die. I don’t want any of my loved … Continue Reading Heartache
Abandonment
“Remain here and keep watch with me.”[i] I’m quite helpless. And I’m afraid. This Lent, as I continue to examine my struggles and weaknesses in the light of Christ, I … Continue Reading Abandonment
Pain
“It was our pain that he bore, our sufferings he endured.”[i] I love being alive, body and soul. Sometimes, though, I think that my diseased, crippled body looks like it’s … Continue Reading Pain
Agony
“Not my will.” How many times have I desperately longed for my life of progressive disability to be different? For countless hours upon hours I have agonized, with teenaged hormones … Continue Reading Agony
Ashes
I’ve never felt betrayal, but I have known loss and change. The world in which we live is terribly beautiful: here is where we experience blossoms and sunlight, as well … Continue Reading Ashes
Approaching Lent
How do you deal with suffering? This is a question that I have been asked more often than usual lately, and there really is no quick answer. Because I’m a … Continue Reading Approaching Lent
Lenten Reflections
My deepest fears, my worst pain, the agony of being human — all explored with intimate meditations upon the Passion of Christ that will be posted here weekly through Lent. … Continue Reading Lenten Reflections
Holy Week
It’s that time of year again. The time of year when I regret not having been harder on myself, when I’m disappointed that the season of subdued quiet and intense … Continue Reading Holy Week
The Coming of Spring
Although my knee injury is improving, it’s still giving me trouble (see last week’s post) so this week’s reflection will be brief. We are more than halfway through the holy … Continue Reading The Coming of Spring
Lent: Finding Yourself and Getting over Yourself
Here’s an oldie but goodie. As Lent begins, we Catholics may look like a bunch of doleful, down-on-ourselves people, but we are simply realistic. And essentially joyful. After all, we … Continue Reading Lent: Finding Yourself and Getting over Yourself
Fat and Ashes: A Lenten Preview
How much of your daily life is fat? How much of your daily life is ashes? The holy season of Lent is approaching, and it begins with two big days: … Continue Reading Fat and Ashes: A Lenten Preview
Preparing to Die in 5 Easy Steps
Last week, I wrote about my reasons for wanting to prepare for death in a way that honors life, because death is an essential part of life as we know … Continue Reading Preparing to Die in 5 Easy Steps
Prepare to Die
Wrote this while two people in my life are actively dying, Mr. John Meehan, a friend and mentor, and my cousin’s husband, Larry Winger. May God grant them peace… Well, … Continue Reading Prepare to Die
Who God Loves More
Because of my physical disability and suffering, some have strongly suggested to me that God loves me more than other people. Yeah, I don’t think so. I’m a sinner just … Continue Reading Who God Loves More
Remember
“Remember that you are dust, and unto dust you shall return.” This flesh, this body of mine, is mortal. It cannot last. Nobody can. Everything living on earth will die … Continue Reading Remember
The God of Silence
What does God’s love feel like? Is it warm and fuzzy? In opening our hearts to let God love us, do we experience pleasant sensations, like an encouraging embrace? I … Continue Reading The God of Silence
