“Not My Will”
[This post is based upon a Lenten post from 2020.] How many times have I begged for my life of progressive disease and severe disability to be different? When I … Continue Reading “Not My Will”
Pain
“It was our pain that he bore, our sufferings he endured.”[i] I love being alive, body and soul. Sometimes, though, I think that my diseased, crippled body looks like it’s … Continue Reading Pain
Agony
“Not my will.” How many times have I desperately longed for my life of progressive disability to be different? For countless hours upon hours I have agonized, with teenaged hormones … Continue Reading Agony
Approaching Lent
How do you deal with suffering? This is a question that I have been asked more often than usual lately, and there really is no quick answer. Because I’m a … Continue Reading Approaching Lent
Just One
Sometimes, I feel so small. This planet is far too large for me to understand, with way too many people for my mind to comprehend. What does 7 billion mean? … Continue Reading Just One
Mama
My mother is having surgery today. She needs to have a full tear in her rotator cuff repaired – a surgery that is not uncommon. But, I admit… I’m still … Continue Reading Mama
The Unknown
How are you with the unknown? Me… Not so good. I mean, I love wonder and awe, and am willing to sublimely surrender to the unknowable, to Mystery… But, when … Continue Reading The Unknown
It Is What It Is… But What Is It?
Facing a forbidding possibility in my life… I hear people say something a lot, which, I admit, rather bugs me: “It is what it is,” they will say when something … Continue Reading It Is What It Is… But What Is It?
Redemptive Suffering
The womb that cannot bear new life is, instead, bearing pain. Seemingly meaningless and devoid of promise, for the hard grip – twisted deformed rocks – makes it unrecognized as … Continue Reading Redemptive Suffering
Trust in You
Trust is not something that I’m very good at. I like to be in control, feeling that I can manage the outcome to my liking. But, of course, I can’t … Continue Reading Trust in You
Inspire
Breathe in deeply. Over the last six weeks, what with pneumonia, then bronchitis, and menstrual flow for 22 days (and counting) I’ve been struggling. Being as small as I am … Continue Reading Inspire
Quickening: Human In Utero
When you looked like this picture, your mother was beginning her second trimester of pregnancy. Your gender was determined in the instant that your life began, but it took a … Continue Reading Quickening: Human In Utero
Different Women in 2 Works of Art
How intimate are you with your landscape? Finding the difference between pretty and beautiful when I took a surprising second look at one of my favorite works of art. Featuring works by Benson and Wyeth.
Cancer and Perspective
For my aunt’s cancer, angiosarcoma, to be removed from her body, her nose had to be removed. After a year and a half of surgeries, nearly torturous radiation sessions, and … Continue Reading Cancer and Perspective
A Prayer before the Feeding
Picture it: An elderly couple sit in a restaurant with a third person at their table. This person appears to be their adult daughter, but she is disabled, needing a wheelchair … Continue Reading A Prayer before the Feeding
Heroic Dads
Last night, I was sick. Pain, throwing up… miserable. I won’t go into the details. What I will say is that being sick is even more difficult when you … Continue Reading Heroic Dads
Christina Chase 