Inside Out

I would like

to have grown

from the inside out.

To know myself,

with my eyes closed,

before I explore

the external world

of color, shape, and sound.

To learn, internally,

to hold onto and release

my anger and grief,

before my fists are formed.

As a baby, I instinctively

clutched

the brightly colored toys,

and my hands learned

to handle.

I would rather have learned,

emotionally,

to stack my joys

into a castle precarious,

beautiful,

and when it falls,

to laugh and rebuild.

It seems to me

that we have all grown

from the outside in,

and our construction

has suffered from it.

For think how easy it is to see a light in the midst of darkness,

And yet how difficult to see a hope in the midst of despair.

unpublished work © 2014  Christina Chase
as first posted on ChaseChristina.com