I have never liked the word “blog.” But I have to say, after nine years of writing on this site, I love to blog.
Reflecting upon my ninth anniversary, I’m thinking about how much happier I am writing here than when I’m writing upon my memoir-in-progress. I’ve discovered the reasons why:
1.) This blog is about my consecration to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. It’s not about me. I share an awful lot about my private life but as it pertains to my life as a Christian, a struggling devotee, and a writer trying to bring glory to God. The memoir, on the other hand, has me as its focus. It gets annoying going on and on about me, about what I did, what I said, what I thought, what I felt, and how it shaped me. Me, me, me. Heavy sigh.
2.) This blog is dedicated to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. The writing of the memoir, however, is intended to please the human beings that I love here on earth and maybe even to make proud those human beings that are my ancestors in heaven. I have thought of writing the dedication to my nephews, as a way of leaving them a legacy or a kind of roadmap of advice for their own lives. … So do you see the problem here? I should be writing my book for Him. If I have the Head as the head, if I put First Things first, then maybe all of the rest will flow.
3.) I work best in little chunks. This blog only has one post a week and each of these posts are only 1000 words or less. A memoir, however, is a book. A whole book. A book with chapters. A book with chapters that need to, not only describe the progress of my life in a good order, the meaning and story of my life, but also engage and enlighten readers so that they are very glad to keep turning the pages and come away satisfied. Yup. That’s a lot of pressure for 40,000 words or more.
Like I said, I work better with little insights, one at a time, in no particular order. And I take myself much better in small doses too. Even this particular reflection is too much of my angst.
Let me start over.
I am grateful. I’m grateful to have been alive for the last nine years and to have been able to continue writing for all of this time. I’m grateful that my blog is actually read by real live human beings — like you, dear reader. I’m grateful that many of you have reached out in comments to encourage me and to share your own thoughts, struggles, and love of God. I am grateful for all of you!
On every blogging anniversary, I usually ask myself some basic questions that every blogger probably asks herself:
Is my blog a success?
Should I continue blogging?
I think I’ve already answered the first question. Success, I believe, shouldn’t be measured by numbers of followers or numbers of likes. It’s not about the quantity of interactions, but the quality. If I’m experiencing true gratitude based on the few people who choose to follow my blog or comment upon it, then I count that as success for me as a blogger.
The second question has also been answered. If I’m experiencing passion and grateful fulfillment as I reflect upon the big and little things of life, listening to God as I write and looking forward to sharing what I receive with you, then there is more than enough reason for me to continue blogging.
I’d like to look at these two questions in a different way, though, much as I now believe that I need to rethink the true audience of my second book.
Who is this blog really for? You? Me? God?
Yes. To all three. But not in that order.
First Things First
God is the one who gave me the gift and ability to write, to process and share moments and beliefs through the written word. I believe that God gave me this gift for two main reasons.
1.) He wants me to seek Him and to find Him, then to love Him and to serve Him. In loving service to Him, God knows that I will find my true fulfillment and unending joy. So this blog is for God so that He can help me better discover and love Him. I praise God in this blog and this praise is first and foremost for the Creator of all things, my gift to Him. But that gift, the gift of love, is the gift that He first gave to me. There’s a lovely circle of completion there, of love that never ends.
2.) The reason that God gave me this gift with the written word is not only for His glory — and “the glory of God is a human being fully alive” — but also that I might reflect His glory to all of His Creation, especially His beloved human beings made in His own image and likeness. In other words, I am meant to share this God-given gift with you. As God helps me to process and understand through the act of writing, He also, in turn, is helping you to process and understand through reading. As I’ve written before, the reflections in this blog are not my ideas. These are the ideas, the thoughts and insights, that have been shared with me by God who, in turn, wants me to share them with you. See the lovely circle again? Especially when you, in turn, share your experiences and encouragement with me and the other readers here.
So thank you. Thank you for reading, thank you for following, thank you for sharing yourself on this site. This is just a little site, a very little site, quite unsuccessful by the standards of the blogosphere. Because of this site, however, I have been able to better listen to God and to share the good news of divine love.
To be clear, I am not saying that God speaks to me! I am not a mystic, no visions of any kind here. But God wants all of us to seek and find Him. My writing is my seeking.
Reflections of Sacred Wonder
Throughout my life, I believe that God is polishing me up to be a better reflection of Him — that’s what God wants to do for all of us. In reflecting upon God, I receive the light and warmth that are the rays of His love and, because of His good work of polishing, those rays are reflected out to the wider world — to you. When there are defects in these reflections (and there are many), the defects are solely my own, because I was unwilling to be polished or too impatient to wait for my Creator to do His work with me. Only if I am truly humble and truly open to God’s will, repenting of my sins and desiring only God’s way, then and only then will these reflections be truly successful. Because then and only then will they be reflections of Him.
I have a long, long way to go. God willing, nine years and counting… (Pray for God’s mercy upon me, for His kind and gentle ways.)
© 2022 Christina Chase
Christina Chase View All
Although crippled by disease, I'm fully alive in love. I write about the terrible beauty and sacred wonder of life, while living with physical disability and severe dependency. A revert to the Catholic faith through atheism, I'm not afraid to ask life's big questions. I explore what it means to be fully human through my weekly blog and have written a book: It's Good to Be Here, published by Sophia Institute Press.
Happy anniversary Christina,
You certainly have a way with words it’s a tremendous gift and I thank God for you! You’ve enlightened me so much with your memoir during the years.
It’s interesting that you have a devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus.
My mother in law had a great devotion to the Sacred Heart.
She lived with us for 13 years and in her bedroom she had a statue of the Sacred Heart which had a place to hold a votive candle. When she had a special wish she would like the candle and the children were so enthralled with this devotion to the Sacred Heart with the little lit candle.
Well Lord and behold! I now own the statue with the little one candle and the devotion still goes on to today.
I will light it now for your intentions Christina, and give thanks for you who inspires so many people .
That’s a wonderful memory! I confess, I’m not very good with the devotion, I do not always do what is required. As I wrote in the last chapter of It’s Good to Be Here, the Sacred Heart of Jesus is the heart of reality, the source of everything good, true, and beautiful. A sublime well from which to draw!
Thank you very much for the special prayer!
Christ the King Sunday, Christina have a great day!
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